Feeling Stuck in Life
When you know something needs to change, but you can’t seem to move
Life can look perfectly fine from the outside. You may be capable, successful and used to getting things done, but somehow you keep circling the same thoughts, postponing the same decisions or feeling that something is getting in the way.
Perhaps you want a different career, a better balance, more confidence, a new challenge or simply a clearer idea of what comes next.
You may tell yourself you need more motivation or discipline......Often, you don’t.
You need to understand what is keeping you where you are, and then work out how to move forward.
What is really keeping you stuck?
The answer is different for everyone.
For one person it may be fear of judgement, for another, guilt about putting themselves first. It may be resentment, imposter syndrome, success inhibition, self-doubt, conflicting priorities or a long-standing habit of putting everyone else’s needs ahead of their own.
Sometimes there is no deep psychological block at all. You may simply have reached a stage where the old goals no longer fit and you have not yet worked out what you want instead.
The important question is not.......Why can’t I just get on with it? It is........What is actually stopping me, and what do I want instead?
The problem is not always the one you think it is
People often arrive saying:
“I need more confidence.”
“I procrastinate.”
“I self-sabotage.”
“I overthink everything.”
“I don’t know what I want.”
Those descriptions may be accurate, but they do not necessarily tell us what is driving the problem.
The same behaviour can come from completely different psychological drivers.
That is why I start by asking questions rather than assuming I already know the answer.
We look at what is happening now, what keeps repeating, what you want to change and what seems to get in the way.
If something from the past is still influencing the present, we can look at that too, but only when it is useful. The purpose is always to help you move forward.
Feeling stuck can look like
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overthinking every decision
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knowing what you want but not taking action
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fear of making the wrong choice
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procrastination
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feeling resentful or frustrated
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putting everyone else first
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guilt about doing something for yourself
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constantly second-guessing yourself
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imposter syndrome or self-doubt
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success inhibition
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feeling disconnected from what matters to you
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having too many options and choosing none
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knowing something needs to change but not knowing where to begin
How I work
InnerShift is forward-facing.
We begin by understanding where you are now, what you would like instead and what may be getting in the way.
Sometimes that means identifying and changing an underlying psychological pattern.
Sometimes it means clarifying your goals, making decisions, creating practical steps and building momentum.
Often, it is a combination of both.
Once we know where you want to go, the coaching becomes practical.
We may:
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clarify what matters most
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set meaningful goals
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break larger changes into manageable steps
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challenge avoidance
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build confidence
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make decisions
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create better boundaries
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test new behaviours
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review progress
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keep you accountable
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adjust the plan when something is not working
I draw on more than twenty years of experience, psychological understanding, neuroscience and specialist approaches including BWRT, HeartMath, NLP, hypnotherapy, TFT, IFS and mindfulness alongside coaching.
I do not use every approach with every person.
The technique matters......Knowing what to use, when to use it and what actually needs attention matters more.
What moving forward can look like
Moving forward will mean something different to everyone.
It may mean finally making the decision you have been avoiding.
Changing career.
Starting something new.
Stepping back without guilt.
Trusting yourself more.
Creating better boundaries.
Putting yourself first.
Taking an opportunity instead of talking yourself out of it.
Or simply having a clear direction and somebody alongside you who will help you keep moving towards it.
For one person, the shift may be confidence.
For another, clarity.
For someone else, freedom, purpose or momentum.
The destination is personal......The aim is to help you understand what has been keeping you stuck and move towards what you want instead.
You don’t need all the answers before you begin
You do not need to know exactly what the future looks like.
Sometimes clarity comes through taking action rather than waiting until you feel completely certain.
You only need to know that something needs to change.
We can start there.
Start with a conversation
If you are feeling stuck, uncertain or frustrated by patterns you cannot seem to change, we can start by looking at where you are now, what you want instead and what may be getting in the way.
A 30-minute conversation gives us the opportunity to talk it through and see whether working together feels right.